Tag Archives: preparation

Get your man involved

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Society has lead us to believe that a groom’s only involvement in a wedding is to have a raucous stag party, show up to the wedding, and enjoy a tropical passion-filled honeymoon.

As we move away from old and antiquated ideals, men are becoming more involved in their wedding day, and the responsibility of planning a wedding no longer needs to fall solely on the shoulders of the beautiful bride.

The modern groom has taken on more and more responsibilities in preparation for the big day, however this doesn’t mean that you need to include him in every single aspect or detail. It is important that you find ways for your groom to be involved so you can work together for your dream wedding.

Don’t include him in everything

We know there are a lot of details and decisions to be made when planning the perfect wedding day, however many of them are far more important to you as a bride. While a groom might be excited about attending a cake tasting, he probably won’t be as thrilled about picking out table linens or dress designs. This doesn’t mean all grooms will be checked out when it comes to the details, but if you have a reluctant groom, don’t overwhelm him.

Tell him about any issues you’re facing

Most men have a desire to fix things; sometimes they even fix things that don’t need to be fixed – as you probably well know. However, if you are facing any issues, it is best to run it by your partner as you might be surprised by how engaged he becomes when he is asked about his opinion regarding any issues you’re having!

Respect that you care about different aspect of your big day

Don’t feel discouraged if your hubby-to-be isn’t as vested in everything that you think needs his full attention. It’s best to present a list of what needs to be done rather than let him choose what he is interested in. This doesn’t mean let him off the hook when it comes to being involved in the wedding planning process, just don’t let yourself get frustrated if he isn’t chomping at the bit to go pick out flower arrangements.

Embrace his creative side

If you have a husband who is handy, artistic, or loves music, finding a way to involve him could be easier than you think. Incorporating what he is passionate about into your wedding will be a great way to assure that you have an engaged groom. Let him book the band or DJ. If you’re groom is a tool smith, let him build something that can be incorporated into the ceremony, as it might even save you some money as well.

Make sure his input is valued

The most important step in this whole process is making sure that your groom feels as if his opinion is valued. If you ask him for his opinion and continually shoot it down, he will more than likely lose interest in playing a role in the wedding planning process. Make sure to encourage his ideas and find ways that they can be included in your wedding.

If you have a reluctant groom, try following these steps and encourage him to be more engaged! It will make your big day even more special knowing that you’ve worked together to make your dream wedding.

Wedding photo ideas to inspire you

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Perfect props

With wedding photo booths becoming more and more popular, brides these days know the importance of a funny prop! Moustaches, glasses, hats and wigs make for hilarious photo opportunities with all your guests, but make sure you get at least one with just you and the girls!

Getting ready

This one’s a classic, but a surprising number of brides forget it! Whether it’s a natural shot of you all prepping for the big day or a posed group photo of you all together (these work particularly well if you’re wearing matching robes, pyjamas or t-shirts!), make sure you capture the atmosphere of excitement and anticipation before the ceremony.

Pucker up

This one is easy peasy – apply lipstick and POUT! We especially like images like this if the bridesmaids are wearing a bright pop of colour on their lips, but it’s a funny, girly photo to have in your album whatever your maids are wearing.

Cuddle with mum

If you have tiny flower girls or if your bridesmaids have young children of their own, it’s nice to get a candid shot of the family having a quick cuddle, especially if the little ones are all dolled up for the occasion.

Drink up

This cheeky photo brings a whole new meaning to the term ‘group shot’! Although it may be more traditional to have a photo of the groom and his ushers enjoying a tipple in the bar pre-ceremony, we love to see brides and their girls partaking in a little Dutch courage!

Funky glasses

These days, many couples use their wedding reception as the opportunity to just have a brilliant rave-up with their friends and family. If you and your bridesmaids are serious party animals, don’t forget to dig out some funny photo props like novelty sunglasses and glo sticks!

Funny face

Having younger bridesmaids or flower girls is great for unintentionally hilarious photo opportunities. Get your little ones to goof it up for the camera for a sweet picture that you’ll love – and can bring out at their 18th birthday parties!

Looking back

This is a great opportunity to show off the back of the bridesmaids’ dresses if they have pretty details like bows or keyholes.

Give it some welly!

Let’s face it – in a British countryside wedding, there’s a very good chance that you and your bridesmaids will have wellies on standby whatever the season. Turn it into a positive – buy cool patterned or coloured ones and have a fun photo with you and your girls wearing them!

Swing out sister

Many country wedding venues have swings in their grounds, so use them for a photo opportunity! This is a particularly good shot for brides who only have a small number of maids but still want the fun of a group shot.

Gifts for your special guests

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Parents of the Bride and Groom

Your wedding day will be a very proud and happy day for your parents. They have seen you grow up, fall in love and embark on newly married life together. They’ve also probably chipped in towards your big day in some way, shape or form. It’s only right that parents of the bride and groom should receive a token of thanks that is truly personal and reflects your relationship with them. We love personalised items like bracelets or watches to treasure and forever remind them of your happiest day.

Best Man

He’s organised the stag do and been a rock on the morning of the wedding, not to mention the unforgettable speech he made. Many best men also take on some of the planning tasks once the bride and groom have chosen what they want. Say thank you with an experience day to share with the groom – think sports cars, off-road driving or paint balling if budget allows. Alternatively, a personalised glass, hip flask or decanter complete with his favourite beverage will be perfect for when it’s his turn to need a bit of Dutch courage.

Bridesmaids

Your maids have doubtlessly helped your day run smoothly, whether that’s helping you in and out of your dress or squeezing your hand before your big entrance. It’s time to treat them in return. Depending on your budget, pamper kits, fancy chocolates, a bottle of Prosecco or even wedding-themed Pandora charms are all fabulous options to say thank you and remember the day by.

Maid of Honour

Your right-hand girl deserves something special. It’s okay for you to give her something different to your other bridesmaids – she has had a bigger job to do after all. If you don’t want to make it obvious that she’s getting something extra, slip a card into her gift bag letting her know that you’ll take her out for dinner or afternoon tea, or have booked a girly spa treatment as an extra thank you.

Groomsmen

Like your best man, your groomsmen have been there for you through the run up to your wedding. Personalised cufflinks are a traditional option, but you could also treat them to aftershave or bottles of wine or whiskey.

Pageboys and Flower Girls

Likely to be littler ones, we even have bridal party gift ideas for your pageboys and flower girls. Personalised chocolates and sweetie goody bags will be popular in the short term, but it’s also nice for them to grow up with a memento from your big day, so don’t discount more grown up gift ideas like a leather makeup or wash bag – they can keep them safe until they are old enough to use them.

Find the perfect destination

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While a destination wedding may be your lifelong dream, remember without your guests there is no event.  Consider travel costs and accessibility from where the majority of your guests will be traveling from when selecting a destination.

Knowledge is power

Ask the hard hitting questions before making a commitment when shopping around for a destination wedding.

Peaks and Valleys

The best time of year to travel to the Caribbean and Mexico is the fall. Room rates are lower and some hotels reduce their wedding package pricing or offer added perks/concessions.

Strength in Numbers

Most hotels will offer reduced rates, incentives and concessions for wedding groups who commit to a minimum number of rooms under contract.

Listen to the Experts

Hotels that are committed to destination weddings will have on-site wedding coordinators. Listen to their advice; who else knows the resort better than they do. They are your eyes and ears during the overseas, long distance wedding planning phase. There’s no added cost to utilize the service and expertise of the resort’s coordinator.

Keep it Local

One of the easiest ways to cut costs is to keep it local. Instead of insisting on midnight blue orchids that have to be imported, use flowers grown locally. Don’t insist on bringing your own vendors. Ask the resort for a list of their trusted vendors and capitalize on the relationships built by the resort with these vendors.

Time is on Your Side

Book at least 9-months in advance for best date selection.  Last minute wedding planning can result in unexpected costs. Plus, make sure the save-the-dates are in the mail well in advance to allow family and friends time to budget and plan.

Legal is so “Yesteryear”

There is no need to get legally married in the destination you’ve chosen. Take care of the legal paperwork in your home state to save hundreds of dollars on the cost of a legal ceremony in another country. You’ll avoid a variety of other ‘legalities’ such as needing to translate documents and blood tests.

Arrive in Style

Plan on arriving at your destination at least three days prior to the wedding day. Use the extra time at your destination and resort to scope out the place, get to know the staff, and meet with the resort coordinator and vendors.

Don’t Go on Price Alone

Trust in the hotels that are willing to show you their pricing upfront. Every ‘free wedding’ promotion has restrictions and requirements.

How to save, and what to splurge on

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Your wedding day should reflect your style, your personality and of course be the best it can possibly be for your budget. 

Your date

Choose a week day or an off-season date and you might find that everything is that bit cheaper, and that suppliers are more open to offers. We’re not suggesting that you barter, but it might be worth simply asking your preferred suppliers if they offer a reduced rate on your chosen date. You never know! It’s fair to say that Fridays have joined Saturdays as premium spots, given that couples and guests like to make a long weekend of their celebrations, but you’ll definitely find much better availability and probably better prices for an early-week, early-year celebration.

Your venue

The best wedding venues will offer flexible packages, with price ranges to reflect what they can offer. To secure your venue on an exclusive use basis will always attract the highest prices, but what about if you were more flexible in your approach? For example, if you chose to have your wedding reception at your favourite restaurant (which will keep costs down in itself), would you be willing to share the space with normal paying customers? Or perhaps you might consider holding your reception somewhere that is open as usual during the day? If the venue can take bookings as normal, it’s going to keep costs down. That said, if you do choose to get married and have your reception in the same place, guests won’t need to be transported, you might be able to stay there too keeping accommodation prices down… it’s all in the planning, which includes negotiation with your venue.

Your guest list

We all know that the big cost of any wedding is in feeding your guests. Your venue will talk about a ‘per head’ cost. There is absolutely no shame in making it clear to everyone from the start (including your parents and anyone else who thinks that they are going to be allocated invitations to give out!) that you are having a small do. Far better to feed fewer guests with an amazing meal that they will remember than lots of guests with food chosen purely because it was the cheapest option. The general rule is that if both of you haven’t met someone, they shouldn’t be on the list, but actually by eliminating big groups like ‘colleagues’ and ‘cousins’ and standing firm on your decision, this will make a huge difference. Manage expectations from the start. Tell everyone at work that you’re really sorry but, much as you would love to invite everyone, you’re on a really tight budget (and you hope they understand?). Enlist the help of a friendly relative to spread the word that the wedding is small and intimate, but the family is big so not to expect – or demand – an invitation.

Your dress

It’s never recommended that you save on your dress! Buying your wedding dress online, or from an imitation dress site, or from anyone that tells you that they can copy a designer dress for a fraction of the price is tantamount to disaster! There have been oh-so many stories of devastated brides who took a risk and it didn’t pay off. Your wedding dress is an investment, something that you will look back on for the rest of your life. You need to get it right, and the only way you can do that is by buying from a bona fide bridal boutique. Good boutiques will work with you and your budget to make sure that you are happy and comfortable with your choice, and show you that you don’t have to re-mortgage to get the dress of your dreams.

 

Your bridesmaids

Do you even need bridesmaids?! Well, yes, of course you do, and it makes sense that you want them to look right, happy and comfortable, too. Bridesmaid dresses are best bought from proper bridal shops too, and there are many options available, but once again, it’s not worth breaking the bank over. Again, it’s about managing your girls’ expectations. If they don’t understand that you are on budget, are they the right person to be your bridesmaid at all? Also, don’t get carried away and have your 15 closest friends… Instead, you should stick to the few that have always been there for you, through the good times and the bad. They are also supposed to offer practical help and support, so think it through carefully!

Your flowers

It’s another thing that you need to fork out for, so get a professional who can interpret your style and work with your budget. That said, there are clever ways with flowers… They can be moved, for example – church flowers can appear again in the evening; bridesmaid bouquets can form table centres – the possibilities are endless. You could even enlist the help of the church flower team, or speak to the venue about sharing the costs, maybe with another event or wedding. There are some incredible silk flower options around – it might be that your out-of-season peonies are better value in silk, for example. Talking of peonies, did you know that they are on average five times more expensive than roses? You should always buy flowers that are in season.

Your photographer

Saving money by hiring someone cheap, or by relying on friends who take good photos will not work. We’re sorry, but you simply can’t take a risk, or rely on, anyone else other than a professional photographer who has a wealth of wedding experience. Taking quality photographs of you on your big day is not the same as taking Facebook-worthy selfies.

Your reception

Of course your best budget bet would be to choose a venue that doesn’t need much decoration, or that already has a huge stock of items you can make use of to decorate. Or you might have some friends who are really good at making things, all of which would keep your costs low. Once you have decided on your theme, you can start to stock up – each shopping trip could include candles, or confetti, or fairy lights. Start a wedding cupboard, and you will be surprised how quickly it builds up! The sales are always good, too, even if your wedding seems like a long way away. And of course you might find that if you get married in December, for example, your venue will be decorated well anyway.

 

Choosing a wedding menu

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As more and more couples become self-confessed foodies, couples are raising the stakes when it comes to choosing their wedding menu. When planning a wedding, whether you desire the ultimate five-course dinner, paired with wines and finished with petit fours and coffee, or you want to embrace global cuisines in a cultural celebration, you’ll find caterers and venues alike offering all of that and more. But, with choice comes a challenge – when you could have almost anything your heart desires included in your wedding menu, how do you choose what makes it onto the plate?

What type of food do you like?

If you find ordering at a restaurant tricky, you’ll find planning your wedding menu even harder. Do you go for something light, something heavier, or something utterly indulgent? Do you go for vegetarian, fish dishes, lots of spice? Do you keep it traditional or go for a full on fusion of flavours?

The easiest way to narrow down your choice of dishes is to start with what you as a couple both love. If one of you isn’t a big fish fan, and there will only be one main course on the menu, your wedding day probably isn’t the day to try to change it – you both need to enjoy your first married meal together!

If you’ve decided to offer several choices for each course in a menu sent out with your invitations, you’ll have a bit more flexibility, so if you and your new husband or wife-to-be don’t have the same tastes, you can still both be happy.

Will your guests like it too?

While we definitely believe that you should put yourselves first on your wedding day, you are going to be spending a lot of money feeding all your guests, too. By choosing dishes that most of them will like, you’ll be spending that money far more wisely and ensure that your guests have as good a time as you do. For this reason, it can be good to avoid some stronger flavours or more fatty dishes.

It’s also worth asking guests to disclose any allergies or dietary requirements beforehand and choosing caterers who can adapt to these – there is nothing worse as a guest than sitting down in eager anticipation of a decadent and delicious three courses only to find that you can’t eat them.

How do you want your wedding breakfast to be served?

Once you’ve narrowed down your flavours and dish choices based on what you love and what will work for your guests, you can fine-tune your wedding menu by throwing the dining experience into the mix!

While the days of an obligatory sit-down banquet have passed, couples who have chosen more traditional and formal weddings often opt for a three or four course meal, while relaxed and outdoor weddings will often embrace picnic, barbecue or buffet-style dining arrangements. Those with a sweeter tooth might like to mix traditional with contemporary trends and opt for an afternoon tea instead!

If your heart is set on a global feast and you don’t want to limit yourselves to a set three courses, why not have multiple food stations? They can serve up everything from popcorn and hot dogs to sushi and curries. They can cater to all tastes and all cultures, guaranteeing that there will be something for everyone.

Find your perfect seating plan

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When planning a wedding, if you’re having 50 guests at a buffet, you may or may not want to give people specific seating assignments. But if you’re having 100 guests or more and serving a seated meal, you’ll want to make sure everyone’s got a specific place to sit. Why? For one, people like to know where they’re sitting — and that you took the time to choose where and whom they should sit with. It’s also helpful if you’re serving several different entree choices, because the caterer and wait staff can figure out beforehand how many chicken, filet and veggie dishes a given table gets, because they (you) know who’s sitting there. 

Create a Paper Trail

If you’re feeling more low-tech, draw circles (for tables) on a big sheet of paper and write names inside them (make sure you know how many people can comfortably be seated at each one). Or you could write every guest’s name on a sticky note and place it accordingly.

Head Up the Head Table

A traditional head table is not round but long and straight, and it’s generally set up along a wall, facing all the other reception tables. It may even have two tiers if your wedding party is large. Usually the bride and groom sit in the middle (where everyone can see them), with the maid of honour next to the groom, the best man next to the bride, and then boy/girl out from there. Flower girls or ring bearers usually sit at the tables where their parents are sitting, much to the relief of the bridesmaids and groomsmen. Decide to sit this way, or plan a sweetheart table for a little one-on-one time

Switch Things Up

But you don’t have to do it that way. All the bridesmaids can sit on the bride’s side, and all the groomsmen on the groom’s. Or maybe you’re not into being on display, or you don’t want your wedding party to feel isolated from other guests. Let your wedding party sit at a round reception table or two with each other and/or with their dates/significant others, and have the head table be a sweetheart table for the two of you. (How romantic!) Another option: You two sit with your parents and let that be the head table, with the wedding party at their own tables.

Place Your Parents

Traditionally, your parents and your parents to be sit at the same table, along with grandparents, siblings not in the wedding party, but for one reason or another you might want to let each set of parents host their own table of close family and/or friends. This could mean up to four parents’ tables, depending on your situation — or have the divorced parent who raised you (or your partner) and his/her spouse/date sit at the table with still-married parents. 

Remember, the parent-seating question is a flexible one. Set it up in whatever way best suits everybody. If you’re unsure, don’t hesitate to talk to the parents in question about it before you make your final decision.

Tame Tensions

There may also be situations in which certain family members just do not get along. Maybe they haven’t spoken in years. Maybe the last time they saw each other there was a drunken catfight. Understandably, you want to keep them as far apart as possible. Think about these kinds of relationships (or lack thereof) before you even start making your chart, so you can take them into consideration in the first place and begin by seating Auntie Maud at table three and Aunt Lucy across the room at table 15. Trust us — they’ll appreciate it.

Play Matchmaker

Again, all your University or school friends will be so pleased to sit at a table together. This especially works out well if you and your beloved went to the same school and have the same friends. It also gives them all an opportunity to catch up with each other, because they may not have seen each other for a while. But again — reception tables offer a great opportunity to mix and match your friends and your partners — who knows who’ll hit it off? Consider seating friends who don’t know each other (yet), but who you think will get along exceptionally well, at the same table — and the rest is history. It can’t hurt!

Start as you mean to go on

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Between the food, the event space, the wedding photographer and the band — you may have spent a large part of your savings on your wedding. If you were lucky enough to receive wedding gift money from friends and family, you can really make this money work for you. Instead of using your cash for a trip to the Caribbean or on a new car, consider the following suggestions:

Start an emergency fund. We know it doesn’t sound as glamorous as a spa package, but starting an emergency fund and help to combat stress when something unexpected comes up. Whether it’s a sudden boiler breakdown or car repair, this saved cash will help if times get tough. It’ll also make you feel better to know there’s a bit of a cushion. We recommend opening an account that offers quick access and storing away £1,000 — you can always add to it.

Pay some bills. You’ve just planned a huge event and you’ve paid your fair share for it, so don’t feel guilty about using some of your gift money for your monthly bills, or even prepaying your mortgage if you have one. If you’ve been carrying around some unwanted debt — credit card, or car loan — consider paying off some of it. Having trouble deciding which to pay off first? Start by paying off the loan with the highest interest rate.

Watch it grow. It’s a smart idea to save and invest a big chunk of your gift money — this way it can gain interest and over time make money for you. It could be your deposit on a home or a nest egg for retirement. A financial adviser can help make sure you’re putting your cash in the best account for you, whether that be a tax advantaged plan, like a traditional ISA.

Invest in your home. If you’ve been looking for a place to call your own, your wedding money may make a nice deposit payment. As you probably know, the larger your deposit, the less interest you’ll typically end up paying on the loan. 

Already have a nest? You could make updates and improvements to your current place, which can potentially increase its property value. 

Look into life insurance. Now’s the perfect time to take out life for you and your new spouse. Pushing a plan to the side any further will make it more difficult to attain. Thankfully, this isn’t a huge investment, just a smart one.

Same Sex Weddings

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Wedding planning is stressful enough. It gets even more confusing when most of the advice out there revolves around a bride and groom—and you’re both one of the above. 

1. Don’t worry about what you “should” do

Instead of worrying about how to make your ceremony line up with (straight) tradition, view it as a chance to throw an event exactly your way, without any of the old-school “must-haves” that don’t mean anything to you personally. “Because many same-sex couples don’t have gendered roles in their relationship, they really have the freedom to reinvent the wedding. 

2. Get creative with your wedding party

Who says a woman has to have maids of honour and only guys get to nominate best men? Choose the guests you want up at the altar with you—whatever sex they are—and name them accordingly. You could have bride’s men, groom’s maids, a man of honour or a best woman, for instance, or give the whole gang a fun name like the “I Do Crew” or “Bridal Brigade.” Or skip the guests altogether and keep all eyes on you and your partner. 

3. Social media is your friend

Can’t visualize what your invitations, vows or any other part of your wedding should look like? That’s what Pinterest is for. 

4. Put your own stamp on the ceremony

Many traditional wedding ceremonies feature a groom waiting at the altar for his bride to walk toward him down the aisle. So what happens if you’ve got two grooms or two brides? It totally depends on what you and your partner feel comfortable with. Some ideas: 

  • Walk down the aisle one right after the other.
  • Walk each other down the aisle, perhaps arm in arm or holding hands.
  • Walk in unison down separate aisles leading to the altar.
  • Flip a coin before the ceremony to decide who proceeds down the aisle first.

5. You can still have your own pre-parties

There’s no reason you have to forego a party with your best mates just because you’re both stags or hens. So go ahead and plan your own celebration, whether it’s a weekend in Amsterdam or a trip to the seaside. One thing that’s really common is two partners having separate parties on the same night and then meeting up at the end.

6. A planner may be worth the money

Though a wedding planner isn’t in everyone’s budget, a coordinator can help you save time by steering you toward venues and officiants that he knows to be inclusive of same-sex weddings.

7. Vet your honeymoon destination before you book

Once you’ve come up with a list of dream destinations—particularly international ones—do a little research first and cross off any that don’t afford the same legal protections and cultural acceptance that same-sex couples have here. That way, your honeymoon can be just as blissful as the wedding itself.

How about a fairground wedding?

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We’ve picked out five funfair wedding venues to inspire you if you want to treat your guests to something a little different on your wedding day. If you can’t find a wedding venue with a funfair near you, why not look into hiring funfair attractions to add something extra to your reception?

1. Marleybrook House

Kent wedding venue Marleybrook House, former home to legendary cabaret star Eartha Kitt, has its own Vintage Fayre! The venue will set it up for you – we recommend keeping it a secret until the day so you can see your guests’ faces when you arrive!

There are retro side stalls including an original 1940s High Striker to test strength and swing boats from 1890. Set up next to hay bales, apple crates and a vintage tractor, it will take you back in time.

2. Blists Hill Victoria Town

If you’re looking for a unique wedding venue in the Midlands, the Ironbridge Gorge Museums in Shropshire are a good choice. This includes Blists Hill Victorian Town, which is a recreation of a working Victorian town complete with a funfair. 

The funfair is set up opposite where most receptions take place and you and your guests can enjoy chair-o-planes, coconut shy’s, swing boats, and on certain days, a magnificent Victorian carousel featuring galloping horses. Imagine the wedding picture opportunities

3. The Hop Farm 

Home to The Hop Farm Festival, The Hop Farm also has a funfair which you can use at your wedding. It includes the amazing ‘giant jumping pillows’ to bounce away on, as well as an amazing vintage carousel, amongst other things.

The Kent wedding venue is popular for those who want a wedding with a fun, unique twist!

4. The Garden Room Syon Park

This stunning wedding reception venue comes complete with adjacent outside space, set within acres of idyllic parkland. The gardens can be used for welcome drinks, giving your wedding day the wow factor from the very start. The gardens can also be used to host a fun fair to entertain your guests, complete with rides, side stalls and candy floss.

A light and airy reception room comes complete with contemporary furnishings and an understated colour scheme, enabling you to keep it traditional or create a personalised look for your special day.

5. Preston Court

Preston Court has a lot to offer when it comes to your wedding – there are large gardens with lakes, lawns and a magical island that boasts a regency wrought iron bridge – so you can marry outside in the garden or in front of a magnificent fairground organ, located in the barn.
There is a full scale and fully operational Victorian carousel, complete with galloping horses and chariots – lots of fun for your guests and amazing for pictures – and a Victorian showman’s wagon which is used as a dressing room on the day. The fairground organs can be played on the day, and there is a selection of fairground games available too.