Wedding dress dilemmas

dresses

Choose your co-shoppers carefully

The people you choose to take wedding dress shopping are very important people. Not only should they consider themselves lucky, but they should have a personality that shows it. If you’ve got a couple of friends you feel will get bored or enthusiastic quickly, they may not be your best choices. Get a small group of people that will offer helpful comments on each of the dresses you try on, and that will keep up interest no matter how long the shopping takes!

You won’t always stick to your plan

Before you embark on the wedding dress search, you might have a specific image in your head. Don’t lose that ideal image of a lace fit-and-flare with an illusion neckline, but don’t dismiss other options. Trying on things you don’t think will suit you may sometimes surprise you, you know… Make sure you try on a range of different designs and shapes, and take the advice of the shop assistants into consideration!

It’s not always love at first sight

Remember, most dresses will look bad on the hanger! Try things on! Whilst the shape may not look your cup of tea while it hangs on the dress rail, the moment you put it on, pair it with a killer pair of heels and add the accessories you might change your mind completely. But don’t go through all the dresses you can get your hands on in the boutique, be selective!

Wear the right underwear

For wedding dress shopping, make sure you’re wearing plain and seam-free underwear to give you an idea of how the dress really should look. Step away from the bras and knickers covered in frills and the bows for today, please. You’ll thank us later.

Consider bridal sizes

Picking up your usual size 10 off the dress rail and it not fitting does not mean those after-dinner biscuits last night has gone to your hips already. Fear not! Wedding dresses are typically one to two sizes smaller than regular street sizes, so don’t get too fixed on the number. And for those brides that are wedding dress shopping with the plans to lose weight, don’t be too ambitious. Often, it’s a lot better to order the size that fits you now and deal with fittings nearer to the big day itself.

You will get tired

Wedding dresses – they’re not exactly the lightest of garments, are they? The repetitive routine of getting undressed and dressed during any shopping day is tiring enough, let alone getting undressed and dressed into a series of heavy wedding dresses. Before you head out, get a good, but light, breakfast down you, and keep a bottle of water on hand – then you’ll be ready for the ‘Wedding dress workout’.

Try before you buy

Once you’ve got it on and think it might be ‘the one’, try and glide like you’re walking down the aisle and move like you’re on the dancefloor! If you can strut your stuff in the dress, we’re with you: it is the one. Everyone present, hold back the tears or grab the tissue.

Get your Groom involved

Society has lead us to believe that a groom’s only involvement in a wedding is to have a raucous stag party, show up to the wedding, and enjoy a tropical passion-filled honeymoon.

As we move away from old and antiquated ideals, men are becoming more involved in their wedding day, and the responsibility of planning a wedding no longer needs to fall solely on the shoulders of the beautiful bride.

The modern groom has taken on more and more responsibilities in preparation for the big day, however this doesn’t mean that you need to include him in every single aspect or detail. It is important that you find ways for your groom to be involved so you can work together for your dream wedding.

Don’t include him in everything

We know there are a lot of details and decisions to be made on your big day, however many of them are far more important to you as a bride. While a groom might be excited about attending a cake tasting, he probably won’t be as thrilled about picking out table linens or dress designs. This doesn’t mean all grooms will be checked out when it comes to the details, but if you have a reluctant groom, don’t overwhelm him.

Tell him about any issues you’re facing

Most men have a desire to fix things; sometimes they even fix things that don’t need to be fixed – as you probably well know. However, if you are facing any issues, it is best to run it by your partner as you might be surprised by how engaged he becomes when he is asked about his opinion regarding any issues you’re having!

Respect that you care about different aspect of your big day

Don’t feel discouraged if your hubby-to-be isn’t as vested in everything that you think needs his full attention. It’s best to present a list of what needs to be done rather than let him choose what he is interested in. This doesn’t mean let him off the hook when it comes to being involved in the wedding planning process, just don’t let yourself get frustrated if he isn’t chomping at the bit to go pick out flower arrangements.

Embrace his creative side

If you have a husband who is handy, artistic, or loves music, finding a way to involve him could be easier than you think. Incorporating what he is passionate about into your wedding will be a great way to assure that you have an engaged groom. Let him book the band or DJ. If you’re groom is a tool smith, let him build something that can be incorporated into the ceremony, as it might even save you some money as well.

Make sure his input is valued

The most important step in this whole process is making sure that your groom feels as if his opinion is valued. If you ask him for his opinion and continually shoot it down, he will more than likely lose interest in playing a role in the planning process. Make sure to encourage his ideas and find ways that they can be included in your wedding day.

If you have a reluctant groom, try following these steps and encourage him to be more engaged! It will make your big day even more special knowing that you’ve worked together to make your dream wedding.

Congratulations! You’re engaged!

If you’re planning the big day yourselves then it’s best to break your planning down and give yourself dates of when to have things done by. That way these milestones will give you a real sense of achievement and you won’t feel so overwhelmed about how much you have to do. Instead you’ll have a clear vision of where you’re at and what else needs to be done and when you plan to do it.

Set your budget

The very first thing couples should do before anything else is to figure out what budget they have for their day. No decisions can be made until you know how much money you have to work with. Seriously think about what your limit is and speak to family members early on about what they may contribute. This is likely to feel awkward to bring up but it is important to do before you begin so you can then make plans for your day that are realistic within your budget and do not get carried away.

Get organised

Once you have added any contributions from family to your own money for the wedding allocate it sensibly to all of the elements (venue, dress, flowers etc).  If you have a wedding planner they’ll be able to guide you on this. Remember to leave 10% for contingency to give room for changes.  Create an excel spreadsheet with two columns, ‘predicted’ and ‘actual’ so you can keep track of everything that has been spent.

Book your venue

Decide whether you would like two separate locations for the day, one for ceremony and one for the reception or if you would rather have it all in one place and begin making appointments to look around potential contenders. Venues get booked up far in advance so this should be top of your list, along with booking your officiant. Make sure you have a list of questions for your venue before you go to view it. Once you’ve booked your venue, it’s time to start organising caterers, photographers and entertainment.

Time to decorate

This is when Pinterest becomes your best friend. Spend some time thinking about your wedding vision and what’s important to you for your wedding day. What are the emotions they want to evoke? Forget about how it will look for a moment and thinking about how you want it to feel. For example fun, heartfelt, romantic, full of surprises, respectful of traditions, or one hell of a party!

When do you start?

Start early but not too early. Starting early gives you the luxury of taking your time to handpick your wedding suppliers and it also means you won’t rush and panic book. You’ll have time to negotiate and do enough research. But be warned – your taste and ideas for your day can change over time and if you start too early you may regret some of the decisions you have made later down the line. Couples often leave the booking of the entertainment until late in the planning. This is usually when their budget is looking a little low and the music has almost been seen as an afterthought. Music and entertainment is super important as it can really create the atmosphere for the day so make sure you don’t leave it too late!

Enjoy it!

Finally as the wedding draws closer be careful not to tire yourselves out the week before the wedding with all those little jobs to do, such as picking up the table decorations, folding the name place cards or writing the wedding photographers shot list. If you don’t have a planner then get help from friends and family. The last thing you want is to be shattered on your big day. Lastly, enjoy it and don’t be afraid to ask friends and family for help. You’re only ever going to do it once so do it the right way!

Survival tips for anxious bride

Weddings are a pretty big deal and they can be kind of scary if you’re feeling anxious about being a bride. Are you stressing about being the centre of attention? Dreading speaking to vendors? Avoiding all the nosy questions? Don’t worry, we’ve found a way to cope with the stress of it all…

It’s ok to not be ok

Getting engaged is pretty amazing, but once the initial excitement is over, it’s not uncommon for brides to feel overwhelmed. There’s a huge amount of pressure for everything to look perfect and to get everything ‘right’. And then you get the added anxiety as you know you should feel happy about planning the most important day of your life, but in fact, when you think about it your heart drops. Is that normal? Of course it is. It doesn’t mean you’re a bad bride or you’re getting cold feet – it’s a pretty stressful time so be kind to yourself.

Long engagements

As soon as you get engaged, people tend to start asking you the date of the wedding almost immediately. Don’t feel pressured to immerse yourself in wedding planning straightaway if you don’t want to – give yourself plenty of time, there is no rule about how long an engagement should be. Discuss with your partner about how long you need to plan the wedding and whether or not you want to tie the knot ASAP. Don’t put yourself under extra stress if you don’t need to.

Accept help

If your friends and family offer a helping hand, accept it! Not only will they enjoy being part of the planning process, it’ll make your job a whole lot easier. If no-one is offering, ask for help! People often don’t want to offer help as they’re worried about getting in the way, but they’re usually more than willing to help out if needed.

Apologise for bridezilla moments

You will probably become a little bit of a bridezilla in the lead-up to your wedding day. Whilst this is completely acceptable, your groom-to-be may not agree. In fact, chances are your groom is going to get the wrong idea and think you’re terrified of marrying him. Make it clear to your husband to be that you’re freaking out about the catering or flowers – not about getting married.

Being in the spotlight is scary

If you’re a pretty anxious person anyway, being in the spotlight probably isn’t your idea of fun. However, it is a vital part of any wedding. Even if you’re dreading being the centre of attention in the lead-up to the big day, when it comes to it you might actually surprise yourself! You’re in the limelight for all the right things, so simply make the most of it. If you really can’t face walking down the aisle on your own with all eyes on you, why not break tradition and get your hubby to walk down the aisle with you?

It’s fine to be selfish

It’s probably the one time when it’s socially acceptable to be incredibly selfish – especially the week before the wedding. It’s completely ok to say no, ignore the constantly ringing phone, or conveniently ‘forget’ to reply to that text. Don’t even feel bad about it. Direct it to a helper, such as your maid of honour or your mum. They’re here to help out!

You’re going to be great

When the big day arrives, you’ll probably be a bag of nerves mixed with excitement. But as soon as you walk down the aisle into your hubby’s arm, everything will fit into place and you’ll forget about everyone else in the room. Your wedding day will whizz by, so make the most of it and enjoy every second.

If you really are getting cold feet, make sure you’re marrying your best friend!

Wedding Day Traditions explained

There are lots of weird and wonderful wedding day traditions – your own wedding day might include a few ancient superstitions to avoid bringing ‘bad luck’ without you even realising! Here are a couple you might not know about…

Rain on your wedding day is thought to be unlucky – not only for the soggy guests, but the rest of the marriage too! However, it is considered good luck for a bride to meet a spider, chimney sweep or black cat on her way to the wedding ceremony.

One of the most familiar superstitions is that it’s bad luck for the groom to see the bride before the wedding ceremony. This one isn’t such a romantic tradition – it originated in a time when arranged marriages were common, and seeing each other was more likely to result in one or both parties doing a runner!

Have you ever wondered why the groom carries his new bride over the threshold? In medieval Europe, it was believed that evil spirits might make their way into the house through the soles of the bride’s feet!

Much of the bride’s outfit has been based upon superstitions, including a white wedding dress to signify virginity and purity. Some think that a sugar cube in your glove will sweeten your union, whilst almost every bride knows the traditional poem, ‘Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue’.

Wearing ‘something old’ is meant to represent the life that the bride is leaving behind, while the ‘something new’ represents her new life as a married woman. The ‘something borrowed’ should come from someone who has had a long and happy marriage, and blue is meant to symbolise purity, fidelity and love.

The final part of the poem is ‘and a silver sixpence in her shoe’. Traditionally the bride’s father would slip a sixpence coin into his daughter’s left shoe on the way to the altar, to bring luck and wish the happy couple a long and prosperous life together. Today, you can buy special wedding sixpences to recreate this tradition.

For many years it was also tradition for the bride and groom to give each other gold and silver coins after exchanging rings, and this act is recorded in the first book of common prayer published in 1549. Gold Sovereign coins and silver Britannia coins are a perfect way to observe that tradition today.

Used to symbolise prosperity, love and unity, coins have a long-standing history within many wedding traditions across the world.

In Wales, silver coins are inserted into the popped champagne or wine corks and given to the bride and groom as a lasting memento of their day of celebration.

In Sweden, the bride’s mother gives her a gold coin to put in her right shoe and the bride’s father gives her a silver coin to put in her left shoe to represent their wish that she will never be without.

In Spain and Latin America, a coin is given by the groom to his bride after the blessing of the rings. It symbolises his willingness to share all that he has or will have. The coin is kept as a family keepsake and passed down from mother to her eldest son on his wedding day.

In Poland, coins are tossed over the newlyweds instead of confetti as they leave the ceremony. The couple is required to pick up all of the coins together as a sign of their new unity.

The usual things people complain about at a Wedding

Sometimes certain things won’t impress everyone, and we’ve put together some of the most common complaints from wedding guests, just so you know what to expect, or what to avoid…

The invitation

From the inconvenient date at the top of the invite, to the lack of mention about a plus one or the ‘No children, please’ at the bottom – the wedding save the dates and invitations can be a source of great irritation to those receiving them. But at the end of the day, your wedding is YOUR day – if you don’t want children there, you don’t want children there. And that is that.

The waiting around

You’ve had the big day planned out for a while now – every hour, every minute, every second almost, but have you thought about the guests? There are lots of times during a wedding day that guests can be left waiting around, whether due to disorganisation in the wedding planning or the vendors. Think about it though: whilst you’re off with your groom and the photographer taking amazing shots for your wedding album, will your guests be happy? Will your guests be okay with you pushing back the three-course meal because you want a pianist to perform at the reception?

The seating arrangement

No matter how hard you try to do a seating plan that will suit everyone, often it doesn’t quite work out. Even your last resort of placing those two certain people on opposite ends of the table could lead to a complaint! And the same goes for when you haven’t put them with someone they want to be with. Don’t stress too much about this though, after all, it’s only for the meal time – they can pick and choose who they do and don’t hang around with for every other part of the day!

The wallet

Forking out extra cash is never seen as a good thing, even to the richest of people! Ensure your wedding day has no unexpected or hidden costs that they’ll have to empty their wallets and purses for, otherwise you might find your reception tables filled with grumpy guests. They’ve paid for your wedding gift, they’ve paid to get here, and they’ve most likely paid for a brand new outfit (not that we’d complain about that!). If you’re worried about how people will react, let people know about things with a little note in the invitations or similar.

The food

Isn’t it strange that once you seat certain people in front of a fancy three-course meal that they suddenly turn all ‘foodie’ on you? Complaints about the food almost always happen, but sometimes it can’t be helped – one person can have very different tastes to another person! The best you can do is make sure you satisfy everyone’s dietary requirements. Those vegetarians won’t be happy if a plate of roasted lamb and gravy is presented to them

The music

Let it be known that, as much as people pretend that dancing isn’t their thing, wedding guests love a bit of dancefloor action. Even the essential dad dancing involved in every wedding is a treat! Make sure you’ve got a playlist, band or DJ that will get people going, and end the evening with a bang!

The lack of appreciation

Whether those you’ve invited have travelled far or not, they will expect to have a little conversation with you at least. Only getting a glance of you as you walk down the aisle just won’t cut it! Plus, a thank-you card after the big day through the post will avoid any complaints about you and your groom being ungrateful about them attending your big day.

Top tips for a relaxing Wedding day

You’ve spent tireless hours planning, crafting, revelling, and swooning over your wedding and the fact that you get to marry the person of your dreams. But guess what? When your wedding day finally arrives, all of your plans are going to be set in motion, and it is time for you to sit back and enjoy! Sadly, not everyone gets to do this for one reason or another… but if you adhere to the following things, you WILL get to fully enjoy the entire experience of your wedding day:

1. Hire A Planner.

At the very least you should enlist the help of a Wedding planner. This way, you can let your planner finalize and secure all loose ends in the weeks leading up to your big day so you can relax and enjoy the fun stuff – like your Hen party, and the final dress fitting! All you have to do is communicate with your planner, and she/he will take care of everything! Finalizing numbers, arrival times, and even making any changes- your wedding planner will take care of it all. This will also eliminate the confusion that can happen in the days leading up to your wedding. It’s so important that you and your planner, are all on the same page- and a planner will ensure this.

2. Limit your activities on the morning of your wedding.

Want to get a morning session of yoga in? Get in your workout? Great. But don’t plan an activity that doesn’t fall within your normal routine. You don’t want to end up sore from a 7-mile bike ride that you wouldn’t normally do on any other day. Or you don’t want be late for the rest of your day because you decided to go get pedicures on your wedding day. Getting ready on your wedding day will take time, so enjoy it. There is also no need to add any stress of completing tasks before the wedding, so make sure you have all your projects done! Be smart and be reasonable with yourself and make sure you’re not over doing anything.

3. Eat and stay hydrated.

Seems like a no brainer but not eating and drinking water can ruin your wedding day. Staying hydrated will help your skin glow in your pictures. And in case you need US to mention the obvious… staying hydrated will also hopefully prevent you from over-drinking and getting sloppy from too much Champagne in the morning!

4. Turn off your phone.

Or at least only answer your planner’s calls. Live in the moment. Your wedding day will pass by so fast- you don’t want to regret spending it on your phone. Plus, if you’ve hired someone to help manage your day, there is no reason you need to be directing people or making calls on what needs to get done. Direct everyone to your planner, but also friends and family- so you can enjoy your wedding day!

5. Trust your vendors.

You spend tireless time researching, vetting, studying, interviewing, and choosing your vendors. So you should definitely feel confident in them by now. You have been working with them side-by-side to plan this big day, so why stop trusting that they will do the best job for you on your wedding day? Give them space and have confidence they’ll handle everything for you. Especially your wedding day planner. She is there to represent you and will do just that, but you have to trust she’s got it covered! Intervening and not allowing her to do her job creates confusion, chaos, and wastes precious time! You hired your planner (and all your other vendors) for a reason – remember that. Also, if there is a vendor who you feel like isn’t on par, discuss it with your planner and she can handle it for you. The whole goal is to not have to worry about anything, right?

So with all of this said… RELAX! Your wedding day will go smoothly with your team of highly experienced professionals. No need to worry about the table cloth colour or whether it will rain. Remember that some things are out of your control and there is nothing you can do to change that. For the things that are changeable and manageable, you’ve assembled your A List vendor team to take care of it. This day should be a celebration and an exciting time filled with love and happiness! Take in every moment and be happy- it will indeed pass by faster than you could’ve imagined! Now go forth and enjoy your wedding day!

Tips to get your first kiss picture perfect

Your first kiss as husband and wife is a momentous occasion and one that your wedding photographer is sure to capture! But what’s the best way to do it? A small peck with lips closed or a full-on smooch?

Your first kiss as husband and wife at the altar should be romantic and full of love, so here are some things to remember.

As well as closing your eyes (an essential ingredient to a good first kiss) and not bumping foreheads as you approach each other too quickly, you should also keep the following things in mind.

Sloppiness

Don’t make your first kiss too sloppy or you will make your wedding guests feel uncomfortable. This is especially true if you are kissing in a church.

Intention

The best part of any kiss is its intention, so do it from a place of love and tenderness and this will come shining through and be reflected in your wedding photographs.

Avoid a quick peck

A quick peck on the lips can be seen as a bit cold and empty, especially when it’s your first kiss as a married couple, so linger a little longer to make sure your wedding photographer can capture that special moment.

Enjoy

Don’t be embarrassed, remember, it’s your special moment, so don’t feel awkward and if you remember the first 3 tips above your love will come shining through in the photos which will be a photo that you will cherish forever.

Winter wedding for your groom

Consider a tweed wedding suit

Known for its rough texture and beige or grey colour, tweed was once considered an informal cloth. Today, people see tweed in a different light. In contrast to the rural and informal associations of yesteryear, tweed is often seen as chic, whimsical and authentically British. Not only have we seen an increase in tweed business suits, we’ve also tailored some fantastic, tweed, wedding suits, too.

Rustic weddings

If you’re having a rustic wedding this autumn or winter, in a barn or a country church, a tweed suit will look fantastic. Tweed was designed for the green but often rainy, Great British outdoors. Nothing looks better against a misty backdrop of hills and fields than a man in a tweed suit.

Add a waistcoat

Still not sure about a tweed wedding suit? Consider adding a waistcoat, making it a three piece suit instead. The waistcoat will balance the perceived informality of the cloth, making it special enough for the occasion.

Warm up with wool

A wool/cashmere blend – whether as a lounge suit or as a morning suit – is a good choice for an autumn or winter groom’s suit. It’s luxurious, comfortable and keeps you warm all day. The fact that this is your wedding suit means durability might not be your number one priority.  This is good because cashmere trousers wear through quickly and tailors will often recommend buying two pairs with your suit.

Look fab in flannel

A flannel wedding suit will keep out the cold and add an autumnal flavour to your attire. Flannel was once the go-to fabric for men’s suiting. This was before wool ousted it as the most popular type of cloth. One very good reason to get married in flannel is that you’ll have the suit for many autumns and winters to come as is it very durable. Its softness, versatility and medium weight means you’ll probably get more use out of it than a tweed alternative.

Eye on the time

If you’re wearing a three piece suit, a classic pocket watch on a chain is a great way to mark the specialness of the day. There look particularly dashing when wore as part of a wider vintage theme.

Bring on the braces

Braces are an attractive addition to a groom’s wedding suit, especially if you’re going for a more casual look – for instance, if you’re wearing them with trousers, a shirt and canvas trainers. Not many modern men get to wear braces.  Like the pocket watch, they have a novelty factor that can look unique in your wedding photographs.

You don’t have to be conventional

1. Walk Down Memory Lane
Make the guest feel like integral parts of the day by incorporating them into the décor — in a gallery of meaningful photos. Why not hang pictures of the bride and groom with friends and family along the walk from the ceremony to the reception. It’s a fun cocktail party conversation starter.” As guests take a leisurely stroll and find pictures of themselves with you, they can reminisce and socialize.

2. Break the Ice Creatively
When you enter your reception for the first time as husband and wife, don’t just take a conventional arm-in-arm stroll. “Run. Skip. Dance. Swoop in on a rope swing! Brainstorm with your groom about the most creative, appropriate way to make a big impression. This is a great way to break the ice and set up for a fun vibe for the rest of the event.
3. Play Party Games
How about the menus being puzzles, so each person got one piece of the puzzle at their place setting, then everyone had to put the pieces together to get the full menu description. Crossword puzzles are fun for the back of a program or if you have guests going on a long bus ride to get to the reception venue.

4. Be Entertaining
Guests always love the energy of a live band but tend to want to hear the original artist sing their favourite tunes. As a compromise, a bride may hire a dance band but also play DJ music during the breaks, or she’ll arrange to have live music during some parts of the event and recorded music during others.

5. Surprise them!
Love poems from a book makes a wonderful, lasting guest favour that’s much more meaningful that a bag of sugared almonds! If you buy in bulk, you might get a discount — contact your bookseller directly. And don’t forget to add a personalized bookmark thanking your friends and family for sharing your big day with you.”