Tag Archives: plan

Same sex wedding guide

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Planning a Wedding is stressful enough. It gets even more confusing when most of the advice out there revolves around a bride and groom—and you’re both one of the above.

1. Get creative with your wedding party

Who says a woman has to have maids of honour and only guys get to nominate best men? Choose the guests you want up at the altar with you—whatever sex they are—and name them accordingly. You could have bride’s men, groom’s maids, a man of honour or a best woman, for instance, or give the whole gang a fun name like the “I Do Crew” or “Bridal Brigade.” Or skip the guests altogether and keep all eyes on you and your partner.

2. Don’t worry about what you “should” do

Instead of worrying about how to make your ceremony line up with (straight) tradition, view it as a chance to throw an event exactly your way, without any of the old-school “must-haves” that don’t mean anything to you personally. “Because many same-sex couples don’t have gendered roles in their relationship, they really have the freedom to reinvent the wedding.

3. Social media is your friend

Can’t visualize what your invitations, vows or any other part of your wedding should look like? That’s what Pinterest is for.

4. Put your own stamp on the ceremony

Many traditional wedding ceremonies feature a groom waiting at the altar for his bride to walk toward him down the aisle. So what happens if you’ve got two grooms or two brides? It totally depends on what you and your partner feel comfortable with. Some ideas:

  • Walk down the aisle one right after the other.

  • Walk each other down the aisle, perhaps arm in arm or holding hands.

  • Walk in unison down separate aisles leading to the altar.

  • Flip a coin before the ceremony to decide who proceeds down the aisle first.

5. A planner may be worth the money

Though a wedding planner isn’t in everyone’s budget, a coordinator can help you save time by steering you toward venues and officiants that he knows to be inclusive of same-sex weddings.

6. You can still have your own pre-parties

There’s no reason you have to forego a party with your best mates just because you’re both stags or hens. So go ahead and plan your own celebration, whether it’s a weekend in Amsterdam or a trip to the seaside. One thing that’s really common is two partners having separate parties on the same night and then meeting up at the end.

7. Vet your honeymoon destination before you book

Once you’ve come up with a list of dream destinations—particularly international ones—do a little research first and cross off any that don’t afford the same legal protections and cultural acceptance that same-sex couples have here. That way, your honeymoon can be just as blissful as the wedding itself.

Jewish Wedding Traditions

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If you’re going to have a traditional Jewish wedding, you may be feeling overwhelmed. There are many traditions to uphold, but they are also lots of fun! So don’t worry. From the kidushin to the chuppah, we’ve got you covered.

Before the Ceremony

The ceremony for a traditional Jewish wedding generally takes place after sundown on Saturdays, or any time on Sundays. The bride and groom are not allowed to eat until after the ceremony is over.

Before the wedding takes place, the ketubah is signed by the groom, in the company of two witnesses. This is a legally binding Jewish contract, and outlines what the groom is expected to give the bride in the marriage. This includes food, clothing, marital relations, friendship, love, and communication, and outlines that all of these things are necessary to a happy union. Many ketubahs are beautiful pieces of art and are framed and hung in the home.

Next, in a tradition known as badeken, the bride’s face is veiled (usually by the groom) and a prayer is said for her. The couple hasn’t seen each other in at least 24 hours (sometimes up to 7 days) at this point, so it’s usually an emotional moment for both the bride and groom.
During the Ceremony

The ceremony takes place under a chuppah, or wedding canopy, and is officiated by a rabbi. The chuppah symbolizes the new home that the bride and groom will build together. When the ceremony is starting, the groom is led into the chuppah by the two fathers, while the bride is led by the two mothers, in a tradition called unterfirers. Finally, the bride circles the groom seven times when she arrives at the chuppah. This may come from Jeremiah 31:22 which says “A woman shall surround a man.” The number seven is said to mean perfection or completeness in the Bible.

A traditional chuppah where the Jewish bride and groom will take their vows.

A traditional Jewish wedding has two distinct parts, with the first known as the erusin (betrothal) or kiddushin (holiness). First, two blessings are given before the betrothal. The first is over a cup of wine, which the couple then tastes. The second is the betrothal blessing. Next, the groom is required to give something of value to the bride (usually a ring). The ring should be a plain gold band, to symbolize the simplicity and purity of their love. Lastly, they both exchange rings and vows.

In some ceremonies, the ketubah is read out loud in traditional Aramaic text and given to the bride to keep for the rest of her life. Following that, the second part of the ceremony begins. This is known as the nissuin, and contains seven blessings that are meant to highlight the new partnership and commitment. The blessings are given by the rabbi, or by individuals who are specially selected. To be selected to recite a blessing is a big honour in this ceremony. After the blessings, the groom drinks from the cup of wine, and the bride follows suit.

The ketubah is presented to the bride as a promise from the groom.

Finally comes the part that almost everyone is familiar with…the breaking of the glass. After the rings and blessings, the groom crushes the glass (usually wrapped in cloth) with his right foot and guests shout “Mazel tov!” which means “congratulations.” In some contemporary weddings, a light bulb is used instead since it’s easier to break. This signifies that the ceremony is over and is greeted with loud cheers and applause from the crowd.

After the Ceremony

In order to complete the ceremony, seclusion is necessary, so yichud is practiced. This means leaving the bride and groom alone for 10-20 minutes in a room. It can take place in any room, from the rabbi’s study to a synagogue classroom. Husband and wife take some time away from family and friends to reflect on their new vows and the ceremony.

Now the celebration can begin! Food is served as well, so this is a great time to hire a Kosher Caterer that’s familiar with traditional Jewish dishes. Several special dances are customary in Jewish weddings, with the hora being most recognized. The bride and groom are raised on chairs for anywhere from 10-30 minutes, depending on the energy from the crowd. DJs or Party Bands are great to have on-hand to get the party started and keep the crowd excited.

In short, a Jewish wedding is all about love, family, and commitment. They’re a beautiful blend of tradition and romance, and end with a huge party. What a perfect day!

How to look after your engagement ring

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Like a good marriage, engagement rings are made of strong stuff. Diamonds and precious metals are difficult to ruin, but to keep them in tip top condition, they require regular care. It’s important to keep your diamond engagement ring clean. Not only from an aesthetic or hygienic perspective, but because diamond jewellery is an investment and needs protecting to hold its value. So how do you make sure your sparkler stays stunning for years to come?

Your engagement ring is meant to last a lifetime but like all good things, it needs a little maintenance to keep it looking super sparkly at all times.

Not many people know that you should always pick up engagement rings by their band and never by the diamond. When you touch your ring, natural oils from your hands can build up around the stone’s setting, which is trickier to clean. It can also loosen the setting – picking up your ring by the band will keep it secure for years to come.

While it’s pretty difficult to chip a diamond, it’s not impossible, particularly if it is knocked against other diamond jewellery and all precious gemstones should be stored safely when not in use. Depending on the value of the ring, you might want to consider a safe. In any case, it’s best to keep it clear of other jewellery and in a soft container or pouch to avoid your ring, and other items, from being scratched or damaged.

Using your hands all day can result in a buildup of dirt and small-particle debris on your ring and especially around the setting. Remove your ring before you shower, apply makeup or creams or prepare food to keep it gleaming for longer.

While dirt can be cleaned, some everyday household chemicals can do real damage to your ring. Cleaning products, hairspray, furniture products, bleach and hair dye are among the most common culprits for engagement ring damage. Remove your ring, wear gloves and make sure you wash your hands thoroughly before putting your jewellery back on.

A shot of vodka can make everything better – for your ring, that is! Soak a dirty ring in a glass of vodka, rinse it under a warm tap and rub it dry with a lint-free cloth to give it back its special shine. If you’re not a fan of hard spirits, soak the ring in a solution, four parts warm water and one-part household ammonia for no more than ten minutes. Brush the ring very gently with a child’s toothbrush, dip it back into the mixture, rinse in cool or lukewarm water and leave it to drain on a lint-free cloth or towel.  Avoid using paper as tissues can leave fibres and dust on the ring. If you have sensitive skin, a mild liquid detergent can also yield great results, just leave your ring to soak for half an hour.

Diamond settings may loosen over time resulting in loss of your stone. Take your diamond ring to an expert for regular wear-and-tear check-ups (and a quick clean while you’re there).

If you follow these tips, your diamond engagement ring should look incredible for years to come.

Get wedding ready

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Be honest about your budget

Even if you’re not the bride, being part of a wedding can be expensive. A new wedding dress and accessories, gifts, travel expenses – it all adds up. Before you buy your outfit or even RSVP, it’s a good idea to be honest about your budget and what you can afford. Don’t go dress shopping “just for fun” and end up falling in love with the designer gown – this goes for brides, too!

Write down all your to-dos

This one goes without saying for the bride-to-be, but don’t think as a wedding guest that you don’t have a lot to get sorted! From hair and nail appointments, to finding the perfect gift, dress and accessories to match, it’s a great idea to make a compact to-do list so that you’re not panicked at the last minute.

Practice those wedding picture poses

Hate how you look in photos? Many people become self-conscious and slouch over as soon as a camera appears. It might sound silly, but spending some time in front of the mirror practicing picture-perfect poses will give you extra confidence on the day. Holding a smile for endless pictures can actually cause you to frown, so remember to try and keep your smile natural.

Have your nails professionally done

Naturally, everyone will want to see your hands on your wedding day! Showing off your beautiful new ring means that people will notice if your nails aren’t up to scratch – the same goes for bridesmaids who are holding bouquets. Take time to moisturise your hands in the week running up to the main event and get a chic matching manicure to your dress or accessories.

Avoid crash diets

Adding ‘clean’ foods to your diet, like fresh veggies, as well as cutting out or limiting your consumption of processed foods, is a great way to look and feel healthier. Avoid crash dieting – it can put a stress on your body and cause your metabolism to go into starvation mode, while also adding unnecessary feelings of guilt during an already stressful time. 

Avoid last-minute treatments (facials, Peels, etc.)

Waxing, facial peels and other intensive skincare treatments can cause short-term in inflammation and irritation, so doing these one or two nights before the wedding is a bad call. To give your skin some time to recover, make sure you have all your treatments done at least a week before the event. This will ensure your skin is radiant and ready in time.

Experiment with hairstyles

Everyone’s hair is different and what suits one bride or bridesmaid might look disastrous on another. Check out some simple hairstyles in a magazine or online and try them out to see what suits. Don’t be afraid to mix it up a bit – if you usually go straight, try some loose curls for an elegant look.

Wear natural-looking make-up

Painting on too much bold makeup will make you stand out in wedding photos – and not for the right reasons. If you love a bold lip colour, balance it out with light foundation and simple eye makeup. A natural-looking glow can be achieved with a good exfoliator, primer and highlighter.

Get to know the rest of the wedding Party

Especially if you’re part of the main event, spend a little time getting to know the rest of the party before the wedding. This is a great way to break the ice and you’ll all feel much more comfortable dealing with any last-minute stresses together on the big day!

Break in new shoes

Wearing new shoes that haven’t been broken in can mean taking them off before the night is through. If you find some new shoes that are perfect for your wedding out t, make sure you spend a few days walking in them around the house so that they’re nice and comfortable in time for the celebrations.

Find the right music for your wedding

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When you begin that walk down the aisle towards your fiancé the atmosphere is going to be electric. So make sure the music you choose is not going to kill the mood of your wedding day.

We suggest that you don’t choose anything too cutting edge. That doesn’t mean to say you can’t show off your taste in music but if you choose that week’s number one hit, you might regret it in years to come. Just as you might regret wearing a wedding dress that’s heavily styled for the moment. Go a little classic and you’ll never be out of style.

There are also some things you’ll need to bear in mind when making your music choices.

You need to consider just how long it’s going to take you to walk down the aisle. It usually takes about one to two minutes for most brides to walk the aisle. So choose a piece that doesn’t have a long intro or is instantly recognisable. If you’re planning a religious ceremony, some churches won’t allow you to play non-classical music or your own music. So you need to check your choices with the vicar.

Next, you should be thinking about how your music is going to be played. If it’s in a religious building, keep it classic and have it played on the organ. Alternatively, you could organise your own musicians to full the hall with romance.

Four pieces of music to play when you walk down the aisle;

The wedding processional from the Sound of Music.

Not a religious piece so you can use it in a civil ceremony. It’s majestic, grand and dramatic all at the same time. You’ll feel like a princess when you walk down the aisle to this.

Clair de Lune by Debussy.

This is a gorgeous tune to have played on the piano. It’s quiet, atmospheric and very romantic. Also not religious, so you could have it played while your guests are being seated.

For The Love of a Princess from Braveheart.

An atmospheric folk tune that’s emotional and sentimental in the right ways. Bound to bring tears to the eyes as your guests watch you start your walk.

The Bridal Chorus by Wagner.

Well this is the most traditional of traditional music to walk up the aisle to. Everybody will know you’ve arrived when this starts to play!

Now what about after you’ve said your vows? When you’ve signed the register and you’re legally man and wife and starting the first steps on your new life together?

Here you can change the tempo a little bit, and have something that’s celebratory and uplifting.

Signed, Sealed, Delivered I’m Yours by Stevie Wonder.

This says it all really. You’ve said your vows and you’re on your way. A timeless piece that’s joyful, catchy and instantly recognisable.