Avoiding family feuding

It’s so easy to forget that there’s an entire family unit (equally important as your own) that may be completely oblivious to the upcoming wedding plans; and although many in-laws are perfectly happy with this scenario for others, it can lead to feelings of rejection and sometimes even resentment if they don’t feel the same level of involvement.

The date has been confirmed, and almost instantaneously, your neatly arrange personal wedding planner is bunged with wedding dress appointments, wedding fair flyers and Wedding cakes sampling sessions. Yet in the midst of all this creative carnage, there may be a few VIPs left feeling a tad isolated… the in-laws.

Out of nowhere tensions rise and emotions flare as you’re left wondering why you’ve been lumbered with such a treacherous display of family feuding. Is this a tiny glimpse of what to expect during married life? A moody mother-in-law offloading her dismay to anyone who’ll listen? Or worse still, comparing you to her other daughter-in-law who is seen as the definition of perfection.

As we all know, when planning a wedding it isn’t just about the Wedding Dress and elaborate selfies. It’s a time when two families become one, so make them feel that way before the big day.

Organising fun family get-togethers can be a great way of helping everyone bond, relax and feel included. It’s always a good idea to start off with a neutral environment such as trying out a new restaurant together. If all goes well, keep up the momentum with joint barbeques, birthdays and regular catch-ups.

Inviting both mums along to help you pick a wedding dress is a great way of making everyone feel extra special, particularly if your mother-in-law has no little girls of her own to coo over. However, if this seems a little too invasive then why not ask for her help with choosing the bridesmaids dress or accessories? It will really help in making her feel a big part of the leading ladies.

Seeing as many grooms enjoy mulling over the manly aspects of wedding planning such as choosing wedding cars, then why not encourage your future hubby to invite his dad along for the day? The two men can spend an entire afternoon bonding over some vintage vehicles, maybe grab some grub and have a good old father-son catch up.

If your groom’s dad is a whizz in the kitchen or his mum’s an expert in arts and crafts, you have the perfect opportunity to include their input for the important finishing touches such as making little edible favours or creating artistic centrepieces for the guest tables. You’ll be amazing at how thrilled they’ll be to show off their creative skills!

Why not start out with a chirpy text message or email? At least they’ll know you’re thinking about them and aren’t as likely to feel completely left out of the loop.

Being able to build and maintain healthy relationships is something we all struggle with at the best of times, however regular communication can help avoid many unwanted feelings of exclusion. As they say, prevention is better than a cure.

 

Things to do for your bridal shower

Planning a bridal shower for your sister, best friend, cousin, or another special person in your life? Then you need a creative bridal shower theme! Some brides are all about wedding flowers and lace while others just want something unique.

1. Seaside themed bridal shower.

Nautical decor is simple and tasteful, using lots of navy blue, gold, and white. You can also use natural elements like, rope, driftwood, or seashells. For more of a beach vibe, use faded colours like coral, teal, or yellow. Natural elements fit beautifully into this theme, too. Phrases like “Tying the Knot” or “Two Less Fish in the Sea” can be used on your decor to add a little romantic flair to the party. Refreshments are pretty flexible. We suggest white wines, oysters, or other tasty seafood for the classier nautical theme. Fruity cocktails like Pina Coladas or Tequila Sunrises are more beachy. Fresh fruit, and other easy finger foods are fabulous for beach themes, as well. Let your bride be a beach bum for a day and let all her wedding stress fade away!

2. Make time for Wine

Wine is a girl’s best friend sometimes. And why not use this as inspiration for a bridal shower theme? Your bride will no doubt welcome the chance to sip some wine, open presents, and just enjoy some time away from the planning process. White wines pair well with white meat or light foods like quiche. Red wines complement richer flavors like red meat and roasted vegetables. So sit back, sip, and enjoy the party with your bride!

3. Brunch and Bubbly

What’s classier than champagne? Hosting a “Brunch and Bubbly” theme for your bride allows for lots of blush pink, gold, and cream. Fresh flowers, white or cream tableware, and cloth napkins are all a must when decorating for brunch. If you’re really ambitious, you can have brunch at someone’s house. If you’d rather have someone else handle the details, hiring a Caterer is always a great option!

4.Mad Hatter Tea Party

A Mad Hatter Tea Party bridal shower theme is perfect! You can get creative with decor and refreshments, too. Use mismatched teacups, plates, tablecloths, and napkins to add to the eclectic feel of the party space. For refreshments, tea of course! And other miniature desserts like petit fours, macaroons, or cupcakes are perfect for a tea party. Adding “Eat Me” placards or even putting the words on cakes or cookies is a great way to incorporate Wonderland into the party. You can serve other drinks like lemonade or wine spritzers, but don’t forget the “Drink Me” tags!

5. Kick back and relax

Planning a Wedding is stressful. Being “on” all the time can take a toll. Laidback bridal shower themes are definitely the best choice for the stressed out bride-to-be. Set up a taco buffet bar with different shells, meats, and vegetables. Add some crisps and homemade salsa or guacamole for tasty appetizers. What would a taco party be without margaritas? There are lots of fun recipes out there besides the traditional lime margaritas. Shake it up with strawberry, mango, or even pomegranate flavors! Cucumber margaritas are a growing trend and are super refreshing in the summer months. Let bride to be kick back with her favorite food…and a cold margarita for some laughs with friends and family!

 

Inviting people

Planning a wedding guest list can be stressful enough, without the added dilemma of whether to invite people your other half does not approve of.

Honestly is the best policy

Being completely honest with your other half is important from the very beginning, and the sooner you approach the subject, the better. Make them feel completely comfortable, and ensure that you aren’t demanding this person to come, but rather asking if they would be happy with the idea. An ex might feel snubbed if they’re not invited, but in some cases, people may not have been invited to spare their feelings.

Think sensibly

Make sure you think about why your other half to be doesn’t like this person? Was it recent? Worst case scenario is your friend going to ruin your big day by drinking far too much and saying something offensive. People should only invite people to weddings if they think that person will be a positive presence at the wedding.

Be sensitive

Ask yourself why specifically you want that person at your wedding. Often people invite people because they are part of a friendship network and if everyone else is going then why not invite them?

Your other half

There is a chance that your partner will say no. It is as much your day as theirs, so it is only fair that you take their feelings into consideration! After all, your ex is an ex for a reason. Every case is individual, sometimes we have enough trouble when the couples’ parents are divorced or remarried without the added pressure of exes being invited too! As long as the couple have discussed it and have both agreed that they are comfortable with it, then there is no problem!

 

Wedding makeup

  1. Peach your cheeks

Choose a peachy blusher and apply to the apples of your cheeks for a fresh and natural look. When applying this type of wedding makeup, blend upwards and along cheekbones to finish.

  1. Wear eyeliner and make it gel

Gel eyeliner is magic! It creates real definition like liquid liner but is so much easier to apply. It looks great on and lasts all day, something you’ll need with all the attention. Opt for brown for fair skins and black for darker complexions.

  1. Line your lips for great definition

Use a lip liner (in a natural shade) all over your lips before applying your lipstick or gloss. It creates natural definition and the colour lasts for hours!

  1. Get your skin in shape

Seek professional advice to ensure your skincare routine is right before your big day. This way, your skin will be in tip-top condition and your foundation will look ultra-flawless. Try using a facial oil at night for powerful and quick results.

  1. Prime your canvas

For perfect bridal beauty on your big day, be sure to start with a primer all over your face to even out skin tone and texture, and help your foundation to last all day.

  1. Choose long lasting foundation

Choose a long lasting foundation to avoid shine and dullness throughout the day.

  1. Get rid of those dreaded bags

Do not use light reflective concealer under your eyes as you risk having white eye circles in your photographs. Instead use a matte concealer or your wedding makeup foundation to hide those bags.

  1. Focus on your eyes

When it comes to the best wedding makeup for eyes, use waterproof mascara to avoid panda eyes in pictures, but comb through your lashes after each coat to eliminate clumps.

  1. Eliminate creasing or fading around the eyes

If you suffer from creasing or fading, make sure you start off with a good base. Use an eyeshadow before your shadow to keep it smooth.

  1. A quick pit stop – touching up on the day

On the day itself, carry with you 3 essential products for touching up; your lip liner, lip gloss/stick and a translucent powder for stopping shine. This will ensure you look your best throughout the entire day. Why not buy yourself a little wedding makeup bag as a treat for the day

 

The perfect Hen party

The Hen party is one of the events surrounding your wedding that you may be anticipating but not know too much about- which is why we are pointing you in the right direction that will help you, your friends, and your family know what to do when it comes time to plan your Hen party.

Although you are completely invested in your wedding planning with the help of your fantastic vendor team, your Hen party is one of the moments when you’re likely going to take a step back and let your Mum, maid of honour, or bridesmaids step in. While you might like a quick planning break, your party may be the first large scale event that your closest ladies have planned, and they might feel a little overwhelmed. So to keep the panic at a minimum, here are eight of our best tips so your shower is one you and your guests will all enjoy and remember:

  1. Don’t be afraid to offer a few suggestions.

Both you and your groom have already built up a rapport with a team of vendors you can’t wait to work with on your wedding day, so don’t be afraid to share their names. Although your best ladies might have ideas of their own, offering the contact information of the pros you love will cut their research time down to a minimum. Also, if you’ve been dreaming of a specific Hen theme, make it known and share your Pinterest board. Lastly, make sure to share the names and contact information of the ladies that must be included on the guest list. Then step back and let the others do the planning.

  1. Decide if the Hen party is a surprise.

Traditionally, Hen parties were always a surprise; however, there are times when a surprise just isn’t in the cards. If the bride does not like surprises, fill her in on the bare minimum specifics – date, time, location, and a hint about what to wear. If none of these points sound like your situation, then surprise away! Whatever you opt to do, make sure to decide early on.

  1. Contact a wedding photographer.

Although the number of pros you opt to work with for a Hen may be far less than a wedding, a professional photographer is simply a must. And their calendars fill up quickly! Personal recommendations, chatting with the bride, and taking a peek at the guest lists are all great places to start in order to find a photographer. Let the hosts and guests enjoy the party rather than worrying about capturing every moment from behind a lens.

  1. Choose your wedding venues, theme, menus, and time.

One point influences the other, which is why they are often a package deal. Some of the most popular wedding venues are country clubs, wine bars, restaurants, and private homes (gardens are a wonderful option!). If you are thinking about hosting the Hen party at a country club or restaurant, know that you’ll be working off of their menu options. A home allows you to completely customize everything from the colours and décor to the menu and length of the event. In terms of menus and times, plan your Hen party for brunch or lunch and have a length of at least four hours in mind.

5 Games or no games.

Hen parties are known for their games, but sometimes they might not feel completely organic to the event you have in mind. Playing your own version of the newlywed game complete with the bride or groom answering fun questions about their relationship on video and guests voicing their guesses tends to be a great option. Another plan – create a ribbon bouquet for the bride to use at her rehearsal as a group. Leaving the games to a minimum will allow all of the guests, including the bride, to relax and mingle instead. Plus, it leaves more room in the event timeline in case lunch or opening gifts takes more time than you had initially intended.

 

Bridal shower planning

The big day is almost here and things can get a little stressful and hectic. Planning a wedding can take up months of a bride’s life and can leave her feeling more relief to get the day over with than excitement for the day to come. Because of this, it is important for the bride to take a day off. A day to relax, eat cake, spend time with friends and family, play games and receive some gifts. Throwing a great bridal shower will be just what the bride needs to regain some of her sanity after months of wedding planning.

Plan Ahead

Usually the maid of honour, bridesmaid, mother or sister will be responsible for throwing the bride her bridal shower. It does not all have to fall on one person though. It is actually a good idea to have two or three people assist in the planning and covering costs. You should allow yourself about 6-8 weeks to plan the shower. Some of the first things you need to work out: What kind of party will this be? Formal or casual? Where will it be hosted? Your home, someone else’s home, a restaurant, a park, etc.? Will there be a theme? Sometimes it can be fun to have a wedding gift theme; such as, lingerie, travel items or kitchen ware. Once you have these basics nailed down, send out the invitations as quickly as possible. Purchase generic ones and fill them out or have specialty invitations printed that match the theme or colours you have chosen. This is a special day to be shared with people that are special to the bride, so have her help with the guest list.

Primarily, bridal showers are about both relaxing and getting gifts that are both fun and useful for the bride and groom. However, it is also important that everyone, both the bride and the guests, have a lot of fun. The most popular form of wedding entertainment for a bridal shower are games.

There are lots of resources online with lists and lists of different games to play. It’s important to choose games that match your bride’s personality. If she’s a shy person by nature, don’t pick the games that will embarrass her and make her uncomfortable. If the bride does not want games at all and wants the shower to be more of a party, then book entertainment. For a larger party, you might want to hire a jazz band classical ensemble or strolling violinist to provide background music as your guests mingle. It would also be interesting to hire an impersonator of one of the bride’s favourite celebrities for a meet and greet and to take photos with the guests. If the location for the shower is appropriate for it, perhaps you could hire a comedian or hypnotist to put on a short show for the guests.

 

How to choose the right music

We suggest that you don’t choose anything too cutting edge. That doesn’t mean to say you can’t show off your taste in music but if you choose that week’s number one hit, you might regret it in years to come. Just as you might regret wearing a wedding dress that’s heavily styled for the moment. Go a little classic and you’ll never be out of style.

There are also some things you’ll need to bear in mind when making your music choices.

You need to consider just how long it’s going to take you to walk down the aisle. It usually takes about one to two minutes for most brides to walk the aisle. So choose a piece that doesn’t have a long intro or is instantly recognisable. If you’re planning a religious ceremony, some churches won’t allow you to play non-classical music or your own music. So you need to check your choices with the vicar.

Next, you should be thinking about how your wedding music is going to be played. If it’s in a religious building, keep it classic and have it played on the organ. Alternatively, you could organise your own musicians to fill the hall with romance.

Four pieces of music to play when you walk down the aisle;

  • The wedding processional from the Sound of Music.

  • Clair de Lune by Debussy.

  • For The Love of a Princess from Braveheart.

  • The Bridal Chorus by Wagner.

Well this is the most traditional of traditional music to walk up the aisle to. Everybody will know you’ve arrived when this starts to play!

Now what about after you’ve said your vows? When you’ve signed the register and you’re legally man and wife and starting the first steps on your new life together?

Here you can change the tempo a little bit, and have something that’s celebratory and uplifting.

  • Signed, Sealed, Delivered I’m Yours by Stevie Wonder.

This says it all really. You’ve said your vows and you’re on your way. A timeless piece that’s joyful, catchy and instantly recognisable.

 

Pick the right shoes

When you are tense and nervous, you are more awkward and therefore clumsier. We know this is easier said than done but this aside, it’s your wedding day, your friends and family are there to see you get married to each other, and they want the best for you. Smile, look directly into your partner’s eyes and take a deep breath.

There is nothing worse than limping around with sore feet because of ill-fitting or cheap shoes. Please remember that comfort is key here – pick a pair from a reputable seller of professional bridal shoes. The biggest secret of wedding shoes is they are designed to be the most comfortable shoes you will ever wear. Most shoes purchased off the high street do not have these extra added comfort features as they have cushioned lining and extra insole padding. Shoes with leather linings are also really comfortable as they mould to the shape of your foot, enhancing the comfort.

Don’t choose your wedding day to be the first time you decide to wear 6-inch heels then totter around like a bride on stilts with your bottom sticking out and sore feet to boot! That’s not a good look and you are likely to fall over, too.

If you want to wear heels and you’re not used to wearing them, then you’ve got to practice! Firstly, relax, then walk slowly, lean back – it may feel unnatural, but you are compensating for heels you have so lean into them. Shoulders back, don’t swing your arms but keep them at your side, one foot in front of the other, heel to toe, head up, smile and glide!

You may have the odd glass of champagne to celebrate the big day, but no one wants to see a drunk bride wobbling all over the dance floor – and falling flat on her face! You won’t have had a lot of practice walking in these shoes so do yourself a favour and stay away from the booze.

 

Sharing your big day

When planning a wedding, ceremonies are all about sharing. While the big day ultimately belongs to you, the couple getting hitched, it’s also a special and significant moment for the people who know and love you best. So, how can you involve your guests to make your wedding day into a truly shared experience for everyone.

For centuries, people have used rituals to help cement their unions. One relatively new wedding ritual is the lighting of the unity candle, where close family members of the betrothed couple light a separate candle each before the ceremony. The newlyweds then take their respective candles and bring them together to light one single flame.

In a twist to include everyone in your new union, you could hold a version of this ceremony in reverse, letting each guest light a candle of their own from your united flame.

Showering confetti over the happy couple is another time-honoured wedding ritual. Make sure everyone is prepared for the big moment by handing out confetti dispensers like wands or cannons to all your guests. (This is a job that you can delegate to a trustworthy member of the wedding party)! Alternatively, why not set up a ‘confetti bar’ beforehand, so that everyone can mix and match their own unique concoction?

Once you’re on the dance floor, you’ll want everyone to come and join the party. Why not make everyone feel included by playing one song for each guest? The DJ can announce any special dedications or significant songs with comments from the nominator. The mixtape approach will make your reception into a truly communal experience that everyone will appreciate… and they’ll have no excuse not to get up on their feet and boogie!

Posing for wedding photographs is the perfect opportunity to get everyone involved while creating some stunning shots! You could set up an aerial shot and get everyone to stand in formation to make a heart shape or a word. Or if you have suitable space, why not lead everyone in a procession around the grounds of your wedding venue? It’ll be a special, shared experience to cherish, and you’ll be able to treasure some ‘action shots’ of all your guests together.

It’s also good to give your guests somewhere they can all share their respective wedding photographs of the day. Wedding apps like WedPics allow your guests to upload all their snaps to one central place, making sure you don’t miss a thing! Alternatively, set up a Facebook event for your wedding day. This will ensure that everyone can communicate and stay in touch after the big day.

 

What to scrimp and splurge on

Your wedding date

Choose a weekday or an off-season date and you might find that everything is that bit cheaper, and that wedding suppliers are more open to offers. We’re not suggesting that you barter, but it might be worth simply asking your preferred suppliers if they offer a reduced rate on your chosen date.

Your wedding venue

The best wedding venues will offer flexible packages, with price ranges to reflect what they can offer. To secure your venue on an exclusive use basis will always attract the highest prices, but what about if you were more flexible in your approach? For example, if you chose to have your wedding reception at your favourite restaurant (which will keep costs down in itself), would you be willing to share the space with normal paying customers? Or perhaps you might consider holding your reception somewhere that is open as usual during the day? If the venue can take bookings as normal, it’s going to keep costs down.

Your guest list

We all know that the big cost of any wedding is in feeding your guests. Your venue will talk about a ‘per head’ cost. There is absolutely no shame in making it clear to everyone from the start (including your parents and anyone else who thinks that they are going to be allocated invitations to give out!) that you are having a small do. Far better to feed fewer guests with an amazing meal that they will remember than lots of guests with food chosen purely because it was the cheapest option. The general rule is that if both of you haven’t met someone, they shouldn’t be on the list, but actually by eliminating big groups like ‘colleagues’ and ‘cousins’ and standing firm on your decision, this will make a huge difference.

Your dress

Your wedding dress is an investment, something that you will look back on for the rest of your life. You need to get it right, and the only way you can do that is by buying from a bona fide bridal boutique. Good boutiques will work with you and your budget to make sure that you are happy and comfortable with your choice, and show you that you don’t have to re-mortgage to get the dress of your dreams.

Your bridesmaids

Do you even need bridesmaids?! Well, yes, of course you do, and it makes sense that you want them to look right, happy and comfortable, too. Bridesmaid dresses are best bought from proper bridal shops too, and there are many options available, but once again, it’s not worth breaking the bank over.

Your wedding flowers

It’s another thing that you need to fork out for, so get a professional who can interpret your style and work with your budget. That said, there are clever ways with flowers… They can be moved, for example – church flowers can appear again in the evening; bridesmaid bouquets can form table centres – the possibilities are endless. You could even enlist the help of the church flower team, or speak to the venue about sharing the costs, maybe with another event or wedding. There are some incredible silk flower options around – it might be that your out-of-season peonies are better value in silk, for example. Talking of peonies, did you know that they are on average five times more expensive than roses? You should always buy wedding flowers that are in season.

Your wedding photographer

Saving money by hiring someone cheap, or by relying on friends who take good photos will not work. We’re sorry, but you simply can’t take a risk, or rely on, anyone else other than a professional wedding photographer who has a wealth of wedding experience. Taking quality photographs of you on your big day is not the same as taking Facebook-worthy selfies.

Your reception

Of course your best budget bet would be to choose a venue that doesn’t need much decoration, or that already has a huge stock of items you can make use of to decorate. Or you might have some friends who are really good at making things, all of which would keep your costs low. Once you have decided on your theme, you can start to stock up – each shopping trip could include candles, or confetti, or fairy lights.