The Best Man

Many years ago, pre medieval times, the groom’s best man stood beside the bride at the altar. He assumed his position at the side of the bride as protection throughout the wedding ceremony. What was the meaning behind the protection? Is it not the best man’s’ job just to throw a huge bachelors party, and say a few kind words at the reception?

The best man was traditionally a friend of the groom, and asked by the groom to be the chief guardian of the bride during the time preceding the wedding. He in turn would appoint mutual friends to help with the duty of protecting the bride and seeing to it that she got to the wedding on time and unscathed. This is the origin of the best man and groomsmen, or traditionally called “The brides knights”.

Of course, scandal wasn’t uncommon in the Anglo-Saxon days of Great Britain. And on occasion it has been told that the Best Man with the assistance of his groomsmen would kidnap the bride. Some could interpret this as being an act of selfishness or unkind, others might detail a different story. Most marriages in the dark ages were still arranged and courtship was granted by the father of the bride to better the family status. Thus, potential suitors would be pitted against each other; similar to applying for a job. Your letter to the father would outline your traits, qualities and suitability to wed his daughter.

Of course, the daughters were still given a lot of freedom and allowed to marry in most instances where they too consented. But in the cases where the parents did not approve, they would see their daughter kidnapped by the groomsmen and guarded until married.

Of course the family would take action and try to dispel the marriage, even whilst the two delinquents were at the altar! Hence you will find that the Groom would stand to the right of the bride at the altar so his sword could be drawn quickly to defend his position in marriage. And the best man would guard the bride by standing on the brides other side until the vows had been completed.

 

Good advice for a wedding speech

There are a lot of people in the world who hate public speaking and unfortunately, a wedding is full of them. Whether you’re the groom, best man, maid of honour or father of the bride we’ve compiled a host of tips to help make your wedding speech the best one on the day.

Don’t Improvise

Think of it a little like an interview – you should go in with a prepared wedding speech and if something comes to mind halfway through, by all means say it but don’t go too far off script. By practicing in the mirror or reciting it before bed, you should find a place where you feel happiest constantly rehearsing your speech. Don’t start planning it too late either; the more time you have to plan it, the better it should be. If in doubt, have a trusted friend read it over to you and offer advice. Relax, you got this.

 

Humour is a Must

This is primarily aimed at the Best Man as it’s their speech which is the one most people look forward to after the dinner. A few jokes are great as it makes the audience like you and once the laughter flows, you’ll grow in confidence as your speech continues. Although yes, you might well be talking to a crowd of over a hundred people, everybody is wanting you to do well and the drink is flowing, meaning it’s as nice an audience as you’ll ever have. Again, if you’re unsure about some jokes, have a friend read them over. Most people know somebody who’s naturally funny as well; tap them up for possible areas where you can add in moments of humour.

 

Make it Emotional

There’s no doubting it, weddings are emotional places. The parents on the top table are often well into their second packet of travel Kleenex by the time you get to the speeches and if you tug at the heart strings during your speech, you can rest assured that they’ll be onto their third by the time you sit back down. Move from humorous anecdotes to more heartfelt contemplations on love and what the newlyweds have found. This blend of deep thoughtfulness and lighter moments combines to create a truly captivating speech.

 

Don’t Overdo It

If there’s one thing we’ve learned from weddings over the years, it’s that there definitely is ‘too much of a good thing’. Nobody wants to be sat watching a speech and urging it to end. Keep it clear and concise and ideally around about five minutes maximum. If there’s a lull in the speech then the audience will feel it and so will you. By all means pepper your speech with memories and hopes for the future, but by keeping it short and sweet, your speech will be remembered fondly for having no ‘fluff’ around the edges.

 

If in Doubt, Leave it Out

It’s a classic adage, but if it rings true anywhere then it’s at a wedding. So whether you’re pondering putting in that one anecdote that might disgruntle the bride or groom, or perhaps if you’re not entirely sure whether a joke is appropriate for the friends and family in attendance, then go with your gut and leave it on the cutting room floor. Sure, it might be a classic tale from your youth or have a genuinely funny punchline, but it’s just not worth the trouble if it doesn’t come across well. Besides, you can always share it with individuals once the wedding entertainment has begun.